Sunday, February 28, 2010

Evil possible...proceed with God

Here is my second devotion that I wrote and chose to not read at choir. I hope you like it, too.


EVIL POSSIBLE
I love my new car – really. It is big and comfortable, drives well in snow and rain, and warns me about things like when to change my oil, if I have an overcharged battery, or low windshield washer fluid or open doors. But my personal favorite is “ice possible – drive with care”.
I really laugh at the “ice possible - drive with care” notice because if it is 3 degrees with a wind chill in the negative teens, I think it should say something more decisive. How about, “if there isn’t ice, you aren’t outside” Or just “its cold – there’s ICE. Deal with it.”
However, when it is one of those warm mornings, high 20’s and low 30’s, I tend to forget that there may be ice waiting for me out there. I kind of get lulled because I’m not wearing my warm hat and scarf and I forget the “black ice” on the roads and that the wet sidewalk may be really slick. Those days, the ice possible warning is an eye opener and reminds me that things may not be as safe as they appear.
I think sometimes it is the same in our lives. On Sunday we sit in church and we are surrounded by other Christians and the pastor is telling us of the evil that is out there. He tells us of the mercy of God and the sacrifice of Jesus. He tells us all these things while we sit in the warmth of the church and we feel all touchy feely about God and faith and we can defeat any enemy because we are filled with spirit. EVIL POSSIBLE – DRIVE WITH GOD. It’s a 3 degree message. We came to church knowing that evil was possible. We are getting the message that we are prepared for.
Then Monday arrives. We get out of bed and start our day. We thank God for another day. Maybe we take quiet time in a soft chair or private spot and pray or do devotions. And we see the message – EVIL POSSIBLE – DRIVE WITH GOD. It’s still 3 degrees out. We are getting a message that we are already prepared for. We are receiving the warning for something we know about and are expecting.
So the day starts and the kids are just not cooperating and may miss their ride to school…the traffic is brutal on the way to work…the boss is so upset and who else can he yell at?...spilled coffee on the report that was just printed and now it has to be printed again but that crazy at the next desk is printing a novel about caring for her cat and the printer delay is going to be HOW LONG? There is a skipped lunch and now it’s time to go and what’s really been accomplished today? At home, the kids have projects that are due tomorrow (let’s make a working volcano before bedtime) and there is nothing defrosted for dinner so it’s cereal and mac ‘n cheese, and WHOA!!!
These are the 32 degree moments. This is when the chance to forget the message you know so well is most possible. This is when you need to see EVIL POSSIBLE – DRIVE WITH GOD. This is when you are making choices to see if you have the strength to be patient and tolerant or to be resentful and vindictive. Do you yell at the kids and bully them or start organizing things to smooth out their morning? Do you whine about the other drivers and their habits or listen to soft music or scripture, knowing that you allow plenty of time to get to work so you may as well enjoy it? Do you pass the buck in defense of yourself so the boss backs off or remember that the real guilty person is having a bad time at home and you can talk to them rationally later? Do you feel discouraged when you see your coffee soaked report or laugh because you have a top for your coffee cup that you never use and you knew that one day this would happen. Do you yell at the cat lady or remember she lives alone except for her cat and he is more than just a pet to her? Do you complain about hunger or grab a snack and remember those who are staving? Do you stress over having no time with the kids because you have so much to do, or get everyone making peanut butter sandwiches while you all work on the volcano? And do you start laughing because it can only get better … because you saw the warning sign: EVIL POSSIBLE – DRIVE WITH GOD.
I hear so many people who say that wearing or displaying a cross, having a Bible in sight, listening to Christian music is just a show. But I have a Bible on my desk and at home. I play Christian music when possible. I have devotionals at my favorite chair and I have a cross with a dove round my neck.
I don’t think that I am showing off my faith or putting on a show. I am preparing for the 32 degree moments. I am reminding myself every day: EVIL POSSIBLE – DRIVE WITH GOD.
In the car, at my desk, in my house, I need a reminder that when things are good and safe and I am distracted by life, a touch to my neck, a desire to read while relaxing, looking for a reference folder at work…I see that I have God with me. I am reminded that I am always in the sanctuary ready to hear the word.
I know that MY God is the God who created everything I see, provided everything I have and is the reason for everything I am.
Most important - I am part of a group that remembers: EVIL POSSIBLE – DRIVE WITH GOD.

Friday, February 26, 2010

An Angel's View


An Angel’s View…
by Margaret Duchrow, Feb, 2010

Oddly, God had left his throne and walked to the edge of heaven. The one and only Lord of all creation was looking down on earth just like the angels tend to do. Angels are always curious about the antics and activities of man, but God always seemed to know what was going on and our excited comments amused but did not surprise Him in the slightest.

This was different. All these days He was watching a boy – a normal human boy, playing and growing. This boy was special. He walked to the temple and spoke with the Rabbis and officials like an equal. Every earthly day the boy grew until one day we looked from the heavenly visage to the earthly face and saw that the boy was so much like God, you would have thought them the same being. This boy was obviously not of man – but absolutely of God. Soon we watched a young man, then a mature man, inspiring and enriching the lives of those around Him.

How joyous the heavens as one by one, and then ten by ten, men turned to God through His only son - the man they knew as Jesus.

But last week, things changed. A dark cloud seemed to develop and hang between heaven and earth. There was joy and cheering as Jesus entered town, but soon it was clear that something had gone terribly wrong. The good feeling and joy had been replaced by anger and bitterness. Jealousy had seized the leaders and fallen angels were dancing in the street.

God watched, not angry or confused. He appeared resigned – nearly emotionless as the scene played itself out…so far below, but it felt so near. We watched and listened. Jesus was in a garden, talking and praying and God softly exhaled and we heard a whisper…it begins.
The sounds of a mob became louder and louder. I saw a kiss…but the sound that echoed through the heavens was a slap. God drew back as if he himself had been struck. He watched the man, his only son, get dragged away and beaten and abused. Those same people who joked and laughed and listened to him a week ago now jeered and shouted in anger – and the words that had united and excited them now infuriated them. Was it the calmness of the man or the truth of his words that they hated?

The earthly shell of Jesus was torn and broken – the human blood of his body running in the streets. Jesus fought the path up to the hill, carrying a cross. God reached down as if wanting to help him carry it, but drew back his hand. God’s face reflected pain yet he did not turn away from Jesus…or ask the angels for help. And we would have helped.
Jesus was nailed to the cross, put on display and left to die a horrible, human death.
He cried out to God, not to condemn the evil that happened – not to save himself from the humiliation and pain…but to forgive those who did not realize what they were doing.

And then, Jesus, with no malice for those around him and recognizing that his time on earth was done, declared…it is finished.
His head bowed and there was no sign of life – no sound – nothing.

God dropped his head and when he raised it again a sound came out. Not a word, but more a roar that was so loud and filled with pain that all in heaven covered their ears…and the reverberation was so great it descended to earth and shook it with unrelenting fury. The heavens closed; blotting out the sun, moon and stars. And God reached out his hand – and with the nail of one finger, slit the curtain of the temple…

We gasped and seeing our surprise, God declared: The barriers have been destroyed forever. The last sign of the separation of God and man is no more. In three days, all doubt will be banished. Those who believe in me, will see that my son is of me and they will know that he is God.
They will take the word to those who didn’t witness what happened here and they will tell them. I will give to all my children what I promised through the prophets and Jesus.
Once again to know…they are my people and I am their God.

And the angels knew that it was over…and just beginning.


Wednesday, February 24, 2010

another Wednesday and I am inspired

I can't believe it's Idol Wednesday already. I have Buffalo Chicken Chili in the slow cooker, a plan to make Texas toast and rice to accompany it and some weight watchers bars in the freezer for dessert. Everything is coordinated to be done by 6:00pm. Guests arrive by 5:30, food is served, tv is ready to go.
Wouldn't my life be better if I had it all organized that well? I mean, my life was totally organized before it happened. College, work, travel - married in late 20's - 2 kids - financially secure by 50.
That was replaced by a few night courses, work (at least something was on plan), married at 19 - 1 child - who can be financially secure anymore?
But I am not complaining. I think I look back on my life and see that it was educational, exciting and challenging.
But I was Pinocchio, thinking that the blue fairy would arrive and turn me into a real person. My problem was that it was an imaginary person that I planned on being. I thought freedom of choice meant that I was going to make myself. How arrogant I was! Once I started to experience things and make choices, those choices totally changed everything.
God created me with a purpose, knowing full well where I was going to succeed and where I was going to fail. He made sure that I had all the tools to be the person HE intended. But I had to learn to use the tools. And, I'm not very good with tools.
Anyway, (I'd make a long story short but it's way too late for that) I did everything I wanted and yet was not anyone I wanted to be. One day, though, I had enough and decided to reinvent myself, but this time I started using the tools. It was hard at first. You know, I had a Bible and used it for crossword puzzle clues and references for Jeopardy answers. Then to have someone say, did you ever read the book of John?, I was challenged...then curious...then obsessed...and finally disgusted with myself for not doing this years ago. I still didn't know how to use it, but at least it wasn't a dusty tool anymore.
So God guided me to a church where there were people to show me how to use my tools. Like "Baby's First Hammer" I used them clumsily. Little by little though, I got better and I moved on to learn to use other tools: different Bible interpretations, resources, devotionals and references.
I started to notice that the drinking, smoking, vulgar people in my life were being replaced by God loving, generous, sober people who were willing to accept who I was at that moment without condemning who I was in times past.
My writing became laced with thoughts of goodness, kindness and blessings. I found myself humming Christian music and hymns; praying in public before meals; thanking God for everything I had and accomplished; giving glory where glory was due.
No more Pinocchio, no more waiting for the blue fairy, no more thinking it was because of me that I was who I was. Finally, I am starting to figure it out. I give it to God and He sorts it, organizes it and gives me back what I need.
My life is in good hands!

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Sunday is almost gone...

...and I am wondering where the weekend went.
I actually had a good weekend, doing dinner and birthday shopping with Chris on Friday, and on Saturday there was a block watch meeting, dinner with Chris and Sam and then, best of all, CHOIR WEEKEND.
Our anthem was "To Dwell In the House" and it was inspiring. I did have a sad experience on Saturday after the service. Duke and I are the Saturday evening prayer ministers. This isn't for any other reason than that we joined the prayer ministry and no one else wanted to pray on Saturday evenings. We have some people we pray with regularly; Mary Jane, an older lady who needs regular prayer to maintain her confidence and faith. She is tormented thinking she is a burden on her children and feels useless. She is a diamond of a person and just doesn't see it. Her sons, Mike and Dave, are wonderful and bring her to service. One of the reasons is to pray with us. Then there is Trent who we pray with before he goes to the rescue mission to lead Saturday service. We get an occasional person who is looking for a quick prayer for a family member, travel or job search, and sometimes someone who just wants to pray.
Last night was different. A woman, Terri, came up and instead of standing with us walked past and sat behind where we were standing. I asked, did you want to pray, and she reached in her purse and pulled out her cell phone. She showed me a picture of her 15 year old son, obviously a special needs child, and started crying. You see, he had died on Friday and her heart was broken. She spoke of how at birth he was expected to live 6 months - how they named him David Daniel after two of the strongest forces in the Bible - of how he inspired everyone with his smile and good nature - how his younger siblings loved him - how his nurses fought to get him the best time and equipment because he was not just a dying child to them. She explained how her husband did total care during the day while she worked, and how while she drove home on Friday, David had stopped breathing and gone to God.
Like any Christian who mourns, she acknowledged that he was in a better place and she knew that now he could do all the things that he couldn't do while alive. She also knew that this changed everything. She had focused on him for almost 16 years - where they went depended on how he would fit in - what they did depended on how he was feeling. Now they finally had a sort of freedom that they never had before, and she was almost fearful of it. To make it worse, she hadn't contacted the church yet, and she didn't know who to turn to. I took her phone number and when I got home, I contacted Nancy Erickson, the pastor's wife, on her behalf.
The point? (remember, my first blog said that maybe I would just ramble on...)
I was really out of my league with helping this woman. I can sympathize with her and pray for her, but can I truly help her? I know that prayer is one of the strongest tools we have for healing. I know that sometimes, especially when the world is spinning out of control, all we need is someone to listen to us and hug us.
In the end, when time comes to face death and the ones I love leave me, how will I handle it? Will I go to church to pray? Will I move forward in confidence or fear? Will I see the light that is in the tunnel, not just at the end? I'll let you know when it happens. Today, I just cheer for the world I have, the family I love and the God who will never leave me.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

I'm scared...

I guess it was just a matter of time before I lost my secure facade and became just another scared person in a threatening world. I woke up this morning with that feeling that it was all going to come tumbling down. I am so small in this world.
Yesterday I really didn't behave very well. I was angry at times and I was insecure. I was trying to move on with my own work, but at work, my coworkers kept telling me stories...most of which bored me to death. That is always a sign that I am a little off because usually I find the stories the guys tell me to be funny or interesting, even if I don't have any idea what they are saying.
But it was different yesterday. I didn't want to hear the stories that would only add confusion to my already confused day.
Why can't I just move on and ignore what is happening around me? Why are there days when I smile and nod and days when I strike out and put down. At least I was able to be professional enough to not yell at anyone. If only I could keep them from "getting to" me.
Today I need to pray - all day. I need to put my emotions, fears, and anger into a prayer box and turn it over to God. I need to let Him be the one to deal with negative emotions and help me throw them from my being. I need to be the person God intended me to be. Is it true that the more we try to move towards God, the closer the evil elements move to us to prevent this trip? I think my fear and trepidation is being fueled by my desire to be complete in God's plan. I think that the closer I get to God, the better my day will be.
EVIL! BE GONE! There is no room for you in my life. God is my focus and you have no place here. Go play somewhere else.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

CHRISTOPHER'S BIRTHDAY

Today is my son's 32nd birthday - do you know how old that makes me? Yes, you are correct...whatever number you gave.
I am sitting around watching the replay of the Winter Olympic opening ceremony as I fell asleep during it and I think Duke was asleep before the beginning. It is an inspiring thing, these Olympics. I mean, you look at all the frustration and anger in the world - then you see the war, the destruction, the heartache...you witness the torture and torment of countries, the violence and destruction and the persecution of the peoples...you see the missionaries all over, even today, being beaten and driven out, or even killed, because they bring peace and a message of equality and redemption...and you must be wondering how all these countries can put aside their differences and compete with rules and respect. I wonder how the athletes and true competitors of the world can represent their countries in the peaceful fight of the Olympics and know that once home they will once again witness the anger and politics that keep them from true peace.
I pray every day for my family and friends to have peace, success and to keep their faith. I am just one single person. Maybe the thousands upon thousands who watch the Olympics in peace could say the same prayer and maybe, just maybe, the result will be peace in our lifetimes.
SIGH! maybe...................

Friday, February 12, 2010

the Bad Day

OK, yesterday was choir but I had an upset stomach all day and then was slightly feverish once I got home. If I am getting a virus I decided to stay home and not spread it. But I digress as my horrible, crappy day started first thing and then moved down to feeling sick and ...
I pass a lady almost every day on Florist avenue. She is walking and I don't know where she goes, but she is ready to work with a lunch bag and purse. So yesterday I stopped and asked her where she was going...she said "Goodwill" and I said, oh, if you had been going my way I would have offered you a ride. Can you believe that?! Goodwill involves my turning right instead of left on 91st street and going up around one block. But I thought it was not on my way. So after I left her walking in the snowy street, I started thinking that being a Christian was not helping people who were going my way but going out of my way for people. I got to work but there was a problem with a Bridgestone price from Mark B and he seemed to think that I could solve it and when I told him I couldn't he was really snippy about he guesses he has to handle it...then Tom H questioned something I have been doing for a while and seemed to think that because WM changed the criteria yesterday I was responsible for it not being done their way in the past... I had words with Christopher because by this time I was tired of being the one who everyone depended on to magically solve all the problems. And the copier ran out of toner with no notice and that meant I didn't have time to order a new toner so the copier and fax are shut down till more arrives...that one was my fault for trusting electronics instead of intuition. Final tally...bad, bad, day.
Today, it's 16 degrees out. I stopped to pick up the lady on Florist. Her name is Rosalind and she is going to be picked up every time I see her from now on. Especially since winter is not over and she may appreciate a ride even if it is only a few blocks. I am starting my day in the grace of my creator and not in the selfishness of Margaret.

It's going to be a very good day!

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Can I Blog? We'll see.........................

I journal every day at home (ok, almost every day) but it is my personal notes and prayers for the day. I have decided to make my journal a prayer journal and share my thoughts via blog. Of course, this means I have to be nice to everyone just in case anyone looks in to see what I am writing about. So I will test this out and see.
I don't know how to text so everything will be spelled out and punctuated according to the rules I was forced to learn and abide by as a child. OH - and NO PROFANITY. I don't aim to shock, just to write. You may find my most recent poetry and maybe some prose. Maybe you'll find recipes that turned out very well, or just rambling, like this. But, I will try to keep up with it weekly. That is my goal. So by this date next year, you should have at least 52 entries to read and hopefully enjoy. Happy Thursday everyone!